How come extraterrestrials only appear...?

mostly to booksellers (authors). they seems to favor a good story writer instead a normal joe like me. i want them to abduct me. i want them to take me to their mothership too. I beg them to probe and dissect me. finally put a micro implant inside of my head. please dear my ET Friends... abduct me tonight. I've been waiting for you a long time. i can write you a good autobiography too